Nearly half of U.S. workers have taken a cue from The Office coworker couple Jim and Pam: In an annual careerbuilder.com survey of nearly 4,000 employees, 40 percent say they have dated someone they worked with. Of those in an office romance, 65 percent said they aren’t keeping it a secret.
Stephanie Losee, author of Office Mate: The Employee Handbook for Finding—and Managing—Romance on the Job says people are more open today because the office romance carries less of stigma. “Everybody’s doing it, so pretending that there’s something terrible about it is ridiculous. People are finding that out,” she says.
It makes sense: That cute girl in the cubicle next door is smart, on your schedule, and you already have a similar interest. But a couple of mishaps and the situation could quickly turn toxic. Losee shares the Do”s and Don’ts of dating openly and successfully:
DO follow your gut feeling when it comes to the boss
Some workplaces don’t bat an eye at rumors that two workers are dating—but if you feel like you have to say something, you’re probably right, Losee says. The most of senior of you should take this on. If you’re both at the same level, choose the person who’s been there longer. Approach your boss and say something like, “Hey, I just wanted to give you a heads up that (her name) and I are dating in case you need to address this in some way.”
Some workplaces don’t bat an eye at rumors that two workers are dating—but if you feel like you have to say something, you’re probably right, Losee says. The most of senior of you should take this on. If you’re both at the same level, choose the person who’s been there longer. Approach your boss and say something like, “Hey, I just wanted to give you a heads up that (her name) and I are dating in case you need to address this in some way.”
DO leave your relationship at the door
Everyone knows you’re dating, so awkwardly avoiding each other isn’t the way to go—but that doesn’t mean you should live out your relationship in the office. Avoid any signs of intimacy or special treatment. Likewise, don’t glare at each other across the conference table after a big fight. Treat each other as friendly professionals.
Everyone knows you’re dating, so awkwardly avoiding each other isn’t the way to go—but that doesn’t mean you should live out your relationship in the office. Avoid any signs of intimacy or special treatment. Likewise, don’t glare at each other across the conference table after a big fight. Treat each other as friendly professionals.
DON’T use company e-mail
It’s your company’s property. That means you could end up having your whole romance printed out for HR to see if something goes poorly. Even for innocent exchanges, use personal e-mail accounts.
It’s your company’s property. That means you could end up having your whole romance printed out for HR to see if something goes poorly. Even for innocent exchanges, use personal e-mail accounts.
DON’T go after the friend
If you break up, don’t go after her work friend. It will never end well, Losee says—and that’s not something you want to deal with on a daily basis.
If you break up, don’t go after her work friend. It will never end well, Losee says—and that’s not something you want to deal with on a daily basis.
http://blogs.menshealth.com
